It's the end of the year.

 The world is good at screwing us up.
Sometimes this doesn't show so readily; it isn't always obvious. The desire to fit in can make us do crazy things. My roommate is a great example.
I don't know what it is about her, but she is a wonderful girl hidden under layers of false perfection. When you meet her, she is very put together, very quiet and difficult to read. For the first few months she barely spoke to us, and I had no idea what she was like. Living with someone changes that. It took a long time, but she opened up. Out of my three roommates, I liked her the most, but I have no idea why. Her true self was revealed to us in the form of a self-absorbed, broken monster of a girl. She hides under layers of makeup and shines her desk light into our faces and leaves dirty clothes in the middle of the bathroom and always turns the conversation back to her problems and slams the door next to my sleeping head and her mess in the closet spills over my OCD-organized clothes and she talks as though no one is trying to get some sleep.
Shouldn't this indicate a person wrapped up in only herself? Yes. But-
All I see is brokenness, and a self-esteem so low that it makes her unconscious of the human beings around her. She criticizes herself but receives no reassurance. She thinks she is shallow, boring, and ugly. She tries to fit in so vigorously that most people believe it. I don't believe it. I did when I first met her, but now I know differently. I should despise her for being the careless, vain person that she can be, but all I see when I look at her is a girl bruised and beaten by a world that has lured her in with its lies. Despite her self-absorbed, walled in little world, when I see her hurting I want to cradle her in my arms and whisper sweet words. I want to tell her that she is beautiful. She doesn't have to hide. She doesn't have to obsess over boys that don't even come close to deserving her. She's worth so much more than what she tells herself. There is a God who gave his life to be close to her.
How I wish she knew all of this, and believed it.
I don't know what it is that makes me see something deeper in this girl. She's so much more than what she appears to be. I know shallowness; she is anything but. I feel weird for ranting on about my roommate like I'm obsessed or something. I guess my point is that the world sucks, and yet it manages to trap us.

Anyway, it's almost the end of my first year, and that's all I have to say about my roommate experience. I have nothing to say about the other two, except that I'm glad I only have to live with them for another week and-a-half.

Summer is so close I can almost taste it! Hurray!